deletedItems: Life, Love and the Pursuit of Zombies.

Disclaimer: Blantant whining post (like the rest of mine aren’t; whatever)

I am beginning to think I am sinking into a state of depression. Not the “I cry my eyes out all the time” kind, but the “I can’t feel happy” kind. I really don’t know what’s making me feel like I just do not want to get out of bed and face the day every morning, but even mundane tasks are hard any more. I think it could partially be because of all my added stress at work…it makes me not want to do anything at all when 5:00 hits. I want to go home, crawl in bed and never get out. I am not having anxiety problems, so I don’t think it’s the GAD not responding to my medication. Crap, I don’t know how to fix it so it’s irritating me. Everything is irritating me. I feel crappy, physically and mentally. I don’t feel like I ever look good, and my life is total crap. As usual, the one bright spot is my husband, but he has his own stuff to deal with, and can’t always be there to make my whiny ass feel better. Part of it is hormonal, I’m sure, but I am so tired of feeling sad!!!!!

Sometimes I try so hard to avoid being something, that I forget who I should be trying to be. If that makes sense to you, I will give you a hug.

Anyway, I am smack in the middle of another hell week. Too little money, too much stress…I think I am getting an ulcer. I am looking forward to a fun as fuck weekend though. Boating, partying and visiting my parents. Well, two outta three ain’t bad.

We get this new chick who moved in next door. Subsequently I am about to move out. Apparently she is a princess who thinks she owns the place. She made the landlady take down the decorative border in the living room because it clashed with her furniture. It’s a 400.00 per month apartment, bitch. Get over yourself. Secondly, she has about 3 people over all the damned time, resulting in 3 cars filling the parking spaces. Having lived here for 3 years, I am used to actually parking in a space, not half a mile away. Ugh. Hopefully when she gets settled in things will be better. Otherwise I am going to be knocking on her door, asking if she is friggin’ blind, or if I need to spell out the fact that she cannot take up THREE FUCKING SPACES?!??!?!

Ok, I feel better now.