“My senses run amuck, like a newborn child…”

My life has certainly become interesting lately, but not because anything in my environment has changed. I am weaning off my anxiety meds slowly but surely, which generally causes some dizziness and various physical symptoms, none of which are pleasant.

I’ve gone off my meds before, and other than having increased anxiety, I haven’t noticed much of a mood-change. This time, however, I am experiencing something new, a little frightening, and not entirely unpleasant. I’ve only noticed it over the past few days, so it may very well be a passing phase.

I feel, I don’t know, alive. Everything seems to be causing a surge of emotions, from listening to a favorite song or reading a good story, to reacting to situations around me.

I feel everything more sharply, much like I used to years ago, but thought I out-grew. Love, anger, lust, happiness, excitement. Everything makes me react. Granted, this has caused me to get very angry at people, frustrated at myself, and overly aware of everything around me. Yet, at the same time, I feel more centered within myself as I attempt (so far successfully) to keep these newborn feelings in check, so I do not react in a violent or inappropriate manner.

As I sit and simply contemplate situations, think about scenarios, I feel the tingling sensation in my spine and bite my lip. Life has handed me a gift.

I don’t know where it came from, or how long it will stay, but I am not willing these feelings to vanish any time soon.

It’s nice to not be numb.